Strength, Courage and Wisdom

Strength, courage and wisdom it's been inside of me all along!!!  Those words speak to me daily.  Those words make it impossible for me to throw in the towel.  I will not give up on my dreams, my goals on me.  I have the strength, courage and wisdom to make it all happen.  Sometimes it takes longer than anticipated...but I'll get there.

Monday I pulled a muscle in my lower back.  Not sure how...I was at work filing...nothing strenuous...but bam...I was unable to stand up straight.  I finally broke down and went to the doctor yesterday.  She gave me the "good" medicine.  LOL  That crap knocks you on your ass.  Unfortunately, I can't take it while at work...and lawd knows I'm in pain right now and wish I could. 

In other news I'm starting a 7 day challenge on Sunday (if my back cooperates).  This challenge includes a meal plan for the week and 6 days worth of exercise.  I'll keep yall posted on how things go. 

Nothing to report in band news...it's still in there and it's still empty.  I've decided to have a revision procedure done.  I'm going through the process of getting all of my ducks in a row so when it's time to submit to my insurance there will be no need for a denial.  I'm prayerful that I will have my procedure done in the month of December. 

I hope everyone is having a great week.

SMOOCHES

A dollar makes me holla....

...actually I need more than a dollar to holla, but I loves me some Honey Boo Boo and that is her saying.

What's up my peeps?!?!  So I lost some followers after my last post.  I don't know who...because I don't keep up with who follows me.  However, I wish them nothing but success in whatever they do in life.

Now on to my money issues.  I LOVE TO SHOP!!!  This is not typical shopping for many females.  This is nonstop...I gotta have it shopping.  Online at work...online at home...in the stores...thrift stores.  It doesn't matter.  I always "need" something.  Ugh...it is ridiculous on so many levels.  My shopping has put my finances in a tail spin of fuckedupness (I know it's not a word).  Has that stopped me from shopping?  Nope.  Now I shop...bring it home...try it on...take pictures for future references...then I take it back to the store.  Don't judge me!!!!!! 

I swear 'fo buttermilk if they had a big girl strip club here in Austin...I would jump back on the pole to feed my addiction.  LOL

On a serious note...why the hell do my kids grow every month.  Like seriously...nothing fits them this month that fit them last month.  I bought a sewing machine to learn to sew...but they are still growing while I'm learning.  It's funny...because they rarely leave the house except to play...so they are always in too small stuff.  LOL...I take pictures and send them to their Godmother so she can feel sorry for the them and buy more clothes.  Manipulative...I know...but read the above statement about my financial fuckedupness.

Okay...exercise sucks ass...time to change it up a bit...again. However, I believe you should keep changing it to keep doing it when it starts to be a chore. 

I hope everyone is having a fantastic week.  It is my "Friday".  Yippie!!!  I wish I could sleep in tomorrow...but I have 3 Dr. appointments and a 5:45 am yoga class.

Delete me if you must...

Yeah...I might lose some followers after this...and I'm fine with that.

I'm reading a lot of blogs from people who travelled to Chicago this past weekend.  I'm seeing a lot of complaints about people not talking to them or being standoffish.

Well who gives a rats ass!!!!  I made sure to speak to, hug and shake hands with everyone at least once.  After that....whatever!!!  Life is what you make it...your weekend should have been about you.  I'm sorry, but I don't feel the need to go above and beyond to speak to anyone.  If you just stand there and stare at me like I'm a science experiment...then no...I don't want to talk to you.  I'm not about to kiss your ass to be your friend.  We are all adults...this is not elementary school...grow the fuck up.

On a more positive note.  It was a great weekend.  Some of the ladies that meet were a little shy...which could be expected.  All of the women looked BEAUTIFUL!!!! 
There were ladies there who I don't follow on the blogs...and I didn't know it.  I will start to follow some...others not so much. 

I hope everyone is having a great week!!! 

What I've learned this week

This week I have worked hard on getting and staying on track with my eating.  Of course it is easier said than done.  However, I can attest to doing a great job.  I did learn something though.

Having a completely empty band does not allow you to get full on 1 to 1 1/2 cups of food.   Nope.  No matter how hard I tried...bandster portions were not enough.  I measured everything and brought enough for the day...or so I thought.  I would get hungry exactly 1 to 2 hours after eating.  The next thing you know I have eaten all of my food for the day...and the day is only half over.  Needless to say it has been a rough week.  There have been a couple of trips tot he vending machine.

Next week I will plan my foods for my empty band.

Hope everyone has a great week.

P.S.  I hate the new blogger.

I choose to live!!!

Often times I try to remember why I decided to take this journey.  Then I remember that I was on a fast track to killing myself.  Although I was morbidly obese I never had any health issues or scares.  But how long would that have lasted?  I knew that I was not going to make it if I kept eating my life away.

My kids coming into my life was the deciding factor.  I had to live for me...but more importantly I had to live for them.  I choose to live and I'm glad I made that choice.

I say all this to say...that since my band is empty I have been eating like the old me.  The me who didn't care.  The me who didn't know when to stop.  It is such a slippery slope and easy to go back to the way I was. 

I refuse to be that person again.  I refuse to give up.  I choose to live...now it's time I did just that...live.  I'm taking back my health...one bite at a time. 

Exercise...no problem...eating...national disaster. 

It isn't easy...but I will never give up...every time I fall...I will stand back up...and keep moving forward. 

I hope you do the same.

WassUp?!?!

Okay...so I've been absent.  Shit happens.

I've decided I need to get back to logging my food...because honey...it has been a sin and a shame around these here parts.  I work out 5 times a week...but it doesn't matter if you are getting crap.  So I'm back on my hustle.  I log with my/fitness/pal.  If you want to be friends my handle is: lynnd719

Let's share our food sins together.  LOL

Other than that...nothing special going on in my life.

Maybe I will post something more important next time.

Tired of excuses

I've made all types of excuses last week of why I couldn't exercise...and I didn't.  It's a shame and a sin.  Now today I'm sitting here feeling extra plump.  LOL

Well this week I will get back to my regularly scheduled program.  At leas 5 days of activities this week.  No bullshit.  I might even try to get off the sauce (sugar) again. 

Here's to a healthy week. 

It's a new day

Today is a day that you can get it right.  Everyday is a time to start fresh.  Stop beating yourself up about what happened yesterday or last night...it's over...the past can't be changed...it's the past...let it go.

Have a great week!!!

Ten Things Thursday....yeah it's still Wednesday

I love these fuck sensitivity pictures...they crack me up.  So I'm using them for my post today.

1.   put on some damn clothes cow!!

2.  Yup...I've been offending people all week.  I don't give a rat's ass about your feeligns at this point.  I'm doing me...so kiss my entire ass!!

3.  Fo' true...I can't stand a liar.  If you are going to lie to me you should just spit in my face...because you obviously don't care....back up off me folks...I don't have the time.

4.  I give zero fucks and I have zero tolerance for bullshit.  Don't make me slap your ass!!!  LOL

5.  My great grandmother says I don't have a filter.  She is right.  I will go in on your ass...because I can.  I don't care if my hautiness upsets you...suck my big toe.

6.  This shit is funny!!!  LOL

7.  Like that little person who thinks he is my boss.  I will stomp your ass...leave me alone.  I don't care that you asked me to do it twice.  I'm not fucking doing it at all.  When you understand that...then let's talk.  NOT!!!

8.  Please, please, please stop talking to me...I don't like you.

9.  My give a damn's busted...yall know I love me some country music.  LOL

10.  Keep it moving.

Okay...guess what yall.  I'm not mad at anyone in particular...I'm just mad about all the crazy shit that has been going on.  people lying to my face when I know the truth.  I hate liars...to me...they are on the same level of scum as a cho-mo (child molester). 

I have Bikram yoga tonight.  I haven't been in a week...I need it...can't you tell.  LOL.  I hope everyone is having a great week. 

Fake friends

Hello my lovlies!!!  How are you all doing?  So I got an attitude.

Let's talk about friends...or pretend friends.  Seriously, people if you call yourself my friend you will always be there for me.  Especially when this thing called life gets out of control.  Everybody is telling their business on FB...if you know it has to do with me...and your supposed to be my friend...call and say...hey girl...you alright. 

If I always have to be the one listening to your worries and drama, but yet you never have time to let me vent...because your broken nail was a damn emergency...bitch you ain't now...nor have you ever been my friend.

Pick up the phone sometime...just to say hi....don't call me with all this bullshit all the time.  Hell I got my own drama to deal with...I don't have time for your shit too.

Listen...as a matter of fact...let's not be friends!!!

RANT OVER!!!

Ten Things Thursday

This is all Laura...this is my 2nd time giving this a try...I think.

1.  This is my short week...so today is actually my Friday...I'm so freaking excited I could moonwalk right now.

2.  My job is still the bain of my existence...seriously...my spirit dies a little everyday in this place.

3.  Potty training my 2 y/o son must be punishment for something I did in a former life.  This kid is not cooperating.  He is he is so cute.

4.  This is my week to do 4 yoga classes...I'm super excited.  Bikram yoga is the bees knees.  You should give it a try.  One class and I was hooked.

5.  I live in the allergy capital of the world...Central Texas.  If my eye does not stop running soon I'm going to scream.  Like seriously...it's almost like I'm crying.  I have a trail of ashy tears running down my cheek...not sexy at all.

6.  I DON'T CARE THAT JENNIFER ANISTON IS ENGAGED!!!  Maybe that means people will start calling her a man thief...since she did take him from his other fiance.  Ugh...by the way...I'm not a fan.  I will not go see any movies...no matter how good they look if they star Jennifer Aniston or Jennifer Lopez...the tramps couldn't act their way out of a brown paper bag.

7.  I'm HONGRY...like I could eat a small village if given the chance.  However...I still have restriction in my empty band. It is amazing.  LOL 

8.  My best friend is coming to Austin in October.  I'm so excited.  It will be her first time seeing the kids in person.  She is their godmother.  If anything ever happens to myself or Charles the kids are hers.  I think she is more excited about her weekend with the kids instead of spending time with me.  But who cares.  She will be here.

9.  I think I need a new tattoo.  It has been almost a year since I felt the needle pierce my skin.  I guess I will go see my guy while I'm at B3.

10.  I'm so darn cute...I can't stand it.  LOL

Friday...how I love you...let me count the ways

I'm so excited about it being Friday.  Just knowing that I don't have to come here again for 2 days makes my heart pitter patter.

Crying for me

I woke up this morning with my grandfather on my mind.  He has been gone for 19 years...but I still remember him like it was just yesterday.  He was my bestfriend.  Today is my Uncle's birthday.  He passed away 1 year ago.  I dedicate this song to those wonderful men.

Boo Boo honey chile

Well I just want to say this...I LOVE MY BAND!!!  At the moment by band does not love me.  Apparently when my band was placed it was placed in an awkward position.  This is liked what caused my slip and dilation in May.  Well that resolved itself and I received a fill in June and another fill in July.  Well I went in today for a fill.  Guess what...my band is dilated and has slipped again.  I was upset at first.  But now I'm calm.  This will require them going in and fixing the issue.  Am I going to let them...NOPE.

As much as I love my band it's time to let it go.  This is the 2nd slip in 2 months.  I'm not one for giving second and third chances.  LOL.  I'm going to have my band removed.  Not sure when.  I meet with a different surgeon on August 23rd.  This will all take place either before or after B3.  For now I'm on liquids for 7 days.  Ha...I hate liquids. 

I say all of this to say.  I am still an advocate for the band...I will still recommend the band to others before any other surgery.  My band has helped me lose and keep off 60 lbs.  Is my journey over.  Hell no...it is just beginning.

Until next time my loves...

I have zero fucks to give

Yep...that is the title.  It ain't mine.  It comes from the fabulous chick name Franceta.  She talks about confidence in this recent vlog post.  It is nice. I love it...because It is me.  It's how I feel everyone should live their lives.

To many times we give others to much power over how we feel about ourselves.  Why?!  My philosophy is fuck 'em and feed 'em catfish.  You ain't running a damn thing in my life.  So for those who are still struggling with the power of believing in and loving yourself...check out this video.