Sooo...here is the situation!!
I feel as if I'm going to fail. I mean I'm 3 months post-op (pictures to come) no substantial weight loss. I know I shouldn't compare my success to the success of others, but that is easier said than done. Of course I don't feel that I should be a skinny minnie by now, but I can honestly say I was hoping for more.
I'm not giving up...no way no how. I'm just feeling blah about the entire situation. I don't want to disappoint myself again.
On a better note...I finally got some sleep. I even managed to exercise that day. I have exercised everyday this week except for Thursday. I'm really proud for keeping the promise I made to myself.
Also, I said I would weigh myself once a week and post it online. I totally suck at this. I never get on the scale...it's just there. LOL. I usually only get on the scale when I go to the Dr.
So there are a pair of jeans I want so badly. They only go up to a size 18. I'm so not there yet. But then again I don't know if I should buy them as motivation. What if I start losing and stay in an 18 for only a short period of time? These are $90 jeans...and I'm the cheapest person I know. I don't want to waste money.
This post is so all over the place....I apoligize in advance for the randomness of it all.
8 comments:
You are right - don't compare. It is hard in the first three months or so. I lost in that span ONLY because I was weightlifting. I was seven months out before I was losing because of the band by itself (stopped weightlifting when I got pregnant and after the miscarriage, didn't start back up again).
Hang in there. It will get better.
Glad you got some sleep. And don't worry about the scale. That's not a bad thing to not obsess over. :)
As for the jeans - I get the price consideration. I will say - you'll be in the 18's longer than the 16's and the 16's longer than the 14's and the 14's longer than the 12's and so on and so forth. It's the way the sizing works -the 18's encompass a bigger variation than the smaller sizes. So while you'll be shrinking quickly in the 18's, they will last longer than you want. If you like them and they are awesome and they'll motivate you - I'd do it. :)
is it wierd that after I read your first sentence, I started singing "...my parents went away on a weeks vacation". I had a Fresh Prince flashback...ANYWAY!
My first 3 months were beyond SLOW. Turtle like. Snails moved faster than my scale. It will happen for you. Believe in yourself, hon.
Oh and randomness is the norm here in blog world!! We're used to it! :)
Dawnya.. what you are experiencing sounds about right to me.. those first few months are your training wheels to get you used to smaller portions and to chew chew chew.. dont drink with meals. and so on. Looking back it was hard for me to understand why that was important to learn. BUT.. once you get in the green zone .. you just can not do anything like that or you will find your self in a constant PB zone and that is NOT fun.. so hang in there. the warm weather is breaking.. a few more fills and you will be flying with the other butterflies
I went through the same thing too, feeling disappointed that I wasn't losing like I had expected to, and I'm sure there will be many times throughout the journey that you revert back to those feelings, but you'll get there! I'm also cheap. I hate spending on clothes I know I won't be in for very long! But I also think it is good to have goal clothes.
Seems like you are picking up some good life patterns (exercise)...that is awesome...I think of this as a lifestyle change, it is easier for me.
Have a nice weekend.
The first few months are definately the hardest. We have the surgery and have great hopes for how quickly we're going to lose. But once the surgery swelling goes we realize how little restriction we have. Our bands are not yet working the way they are intended to work. So we get a fill or two and for many people, things don't feel that different.
All I can say is keep getting fills and don't give up because when you get good restriction, EVERYTHING changes. All the sudden you're pushing yourself to get 800 calories in. You eat 1/2 cup of food and can't eat anymore.
I know you'll get there! Just keep plugging away. Use this time to practice the good bandster habits - eat slowly, small bites, no more than 1.5 cups of food per meal, chew, chew, chew and don't drink while eating. Focus on protein then eat your veggies and last the carbs. You can do this!
Honey - I can't tell you how many blogs I've read of people in a timeline where they haven't lost what they thought they would AND they always come out of it and are successful. You will be okay - we are all here.
Hi Dawnya - I'm one of your 50, but haven't commented before. Don't be despondent - you have so much on your hands at present, I am just amazed that you manage it all! I have no idea how you function between work, kids, baby - let alone trying to focus on your weightloss. Hang in there.. good things will happen for you
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